Movie trailer tip

When a two minute trailer mysteriously features no dialogue whatsoever, the movie is not in English. Movie marketers don't want to tell you that though. They apparently think (and maybe this is backed up by research) that a wordless trailer will sell more tickets than a subtitled trailer. Probably the subtitle haters are annoyed when they discover the ruse, but the ticket is bought by then. May as well grit out the French; the other screens are playing some thing where Sandra Bullock and/or Jennifer Aniston find love and self-realization with Patrick Dempsey and/or Matthew McConaughey.



This movie for instance is about Swedish vampires, not mute vampires.

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I am feeling very ridiculous* here. For noreaster-based reasons, today I had to break out a seriously old pair of hiking boots from the closet before driving to work. On the walk from the parking lot to the office, the things fell apart in a very cartoony way, almost emitting an audible "Sproing!" The soles delaminated from the toe to the mid shoe, flopping around like clown shoes. (Aside: it's sort of quantum mechanically freaky how connected pairs of shoes are. These things were constructed maybe ten years ago and have been separate physical entities since then. Since they were made at the same time from the same materials using the same process, then put through ten years of identical wear and conditions by me, they failed in the same way a mere ten seconds apart. I find that awesome to contemplate. It's like 79 year old identical twins having identical heart attacks on a random Thursday at 10:07 and 10:08 AM.) So anyway, with shoes a-flapping, I had to suddenly adopt an exaggerated high step reminiscent of a drunk Nazi or John Cleese's Ministry Of Silly Walks functionary in order to succesfully make it into my office. I have been sitting here in shame ever since, afraid to venture forth into the hallways, much less the bathroom, which I mention for no particularly urgent reason. The choice is between an unsanitary and frankly disgusting sock walk, and more Cleeseing it up with the boots. Furthermore, the boots are prodigiously shedding a black rubbery padding material from the now exposed layer just above the sole. So if I go with the boots I will also leave an unmistakable, incriminating trail. If I had some duct tape I could effect a repair. Alas.

*And a man in my position can't afford to look ridiculous!